Conscious and Joyful Parenting with the Spirit Coach® Tools
As parents on a spiritual path, integrity with ourselves often becomes an issue; strong social programs insist that we sacrifice ourselves for our loved ones. However, when we finally make the decision to put ourselves at the center of our lives, our loved ones learn that they are also worthy of receiving everything they want and need. When we consciously intend to open more and more to the infinite support of Source, they learn that we’re never alone during our time on Earth; help is always there, if we just ask. Opening to this support from Creator lifts a heavy burden from both parent and child, leaving far more room to co-create a joyful relationship. What a relief!
The following are some of the tools I’ve found most effective in my journey of conscious parenting:
1. Ask, ask, ask. Make a practice of asking for divine guidance and support, both for yourself and with your children. Understanding that divine help is literally there for the asking has been vital to my ability to take some extremely challenging steps in the past few years and emerge with my sanity intact. I come from a fiercely independent Puritan lineage, so it was a major breakthrough for me to realize that I could ask God for help and actually receive healing and guidance in return. Similarly, while my relationship with my guides is still an area of growth, it’s one I’m committed to; I ask for guidance for myself each morning as a way to co-create my day, and I pray with my son before bed to set a high-vibrational space for both of us during dreamtime. I also remind my son that he has “angels” who are there to help him, so he knows he doesn’t have to feel that he’s alone in life. I know that my commitment to asking in this way for myself will help my son maintain his own connection as he grows older.
2. Use intention to create the highest and best experience for you and your family. Ask most parents what their greatest desire is for their children, and they’ll say, “I want them to be happy.” When we ask ourselves what “happiness” means to us, the answer often emerges in the form of qualities such as peace, joy, and fulfillment. When we work with intention, we are working at the level of energy to align our experience with the qualities that represent our highest and best good. It’s a great practice to write down an intention each morning after meditation; it brings who you’re being into alignment with your spirit’s intentions and relieves you from the need to control how it happens. Whew!
3. Cultivate presence. For many families, "quality time" is an elusive goal that gets lost in the chaos of a busy life. What is the missing ingredient that marks the difference between so-called "quality" time and the kind of rushing around that leaves us feeling disconnected? It’s one of the simplest tools we use in Spirit Coaching, but it can also be one of the most difficult to master: presence, or grounding. In Spirit Coaching, grounding is one of the first tools we teach, because we recognize that without grounding, the other 45+ tools in the workbook are much less effective. It’s emphasized with every meditation and exercise, because coaches know from their own experience that it takes constant practice before grounding starts to feel easy and natural. What a payoff, though – after practicing this tool consistently for over 7 years, I can honestly say that most of the time I spend with my son feels like quality time, simply because I am so much more present.
My journey of being Spirit Led Instead has led to a much more joyful experience, not only of being a parent, but of being alive. I look back now on my decision to undertake coaching myself as a turning point, not only in my own life, but in my lineage through my healing relationship with my son. Although the path of conscious parenting may feel like a slog sometimes, the view is always worth it.
Natalie Doel is a Master Certified Spirit Coach® and parent who brings warmth, humor, and a deep commitment to her own growth in service of her clients’ empowerment. For more information about Natalie, go to http://www.spiritcoachtraining.com/natalie-doel/
